Saturday, September 17, 2011

Dictafawn: Dictafawn Endorsement: Unicorngun & Riley Theodore...

Dictafawn: Dictafawn Endorsement: Unicorngun & Riley Theodore...: I won't normally do these but I figured this was relevant enough since, afterall, I did produce it:

Riley and pal James on a microcassette label!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Autumn Update...

So, I didn't post any new content all summer. That's pretty much because the whole project has flopped due to lack of interest. But the dream never dies, so here's how me and the gang have been wasting our time and money!

I bought a pearl blue Hohner electric guitar that is the sexiest thing I own. Although I continue to practice music and song writing daily, the death of our beloved four-track has ground all production to a halt. I also have picked up bongos and new pan flutes to round out the natural sound.

Alex bought Logic, the fancy edition, and a new MIDI controller. What that means is: he now has more synthesizer programs with more depth than he knows what to do with. Alex and I still jam together a few times a week, but nothing is recorded or performed live. Also, one of the keys broke off his MicroKORG which is really sad.

Riley has my old Japanese, humbucker electric which he has detuned beyond all recognition and plays through the delay devices that Adam built. I think he fixed his 'jo also, so I'm sure roots and blues are still on the menu.

Adam moved to Maine. I have no idea if he's still producing anything, but he bought me a present at a garage sale and that's nothing to shit at.

OKAY So, maybe we don't take this stuff seriously enough to ever be successful, or even have our friends and girlfriends know our songs. And maybe I haven't performed on stage in two years, but isn't the desire to do something at least a step in the right direction towards accomplishment?


Friday, March 25, 2011

....5D Webzine

Hello all (I like assuming people read this).

Finally we've come up with a way to unify all of the post-cassette tape planning into one hyper-media! The 5D webzine is a new invention never before produced or seen. Like a magazine it features recurring features every month or quarter- including simple text and images. Unlike a magazine, content exists within a tesseract of eight independent feature cubes that a reader can browse between.

When you're watching a TV do you always wish your remote could flip between the A story and the B story, instead of just changing channels? That's the essential idea behind a 5D magazine. We offer an A through G story with divisions at the ends of normal attention spans. But unlike TV we offer lots of media: games, puppet shows, comix, and the music map project.

Here are some shows we are writing:
-Tapeater's Landfill Follies
Puppets made of garbage live in a landfill and have madcap adventures
Following the exploits of the Radical Rhombus- this ode to Flatland is also a parody of JRPGS
-Music Map
Releasing landscape albums as part of a magazine is cool
-Lita and Rochelle are Small Business Women
A comic that follows a duo of do-nothings in economic escapades

Plus expect Sun Machine, Zoo Puma + Vampiger, and other original content from musicians and filmmakers!

Sunday, March 13, 2011


make gif"hello," said man-turtley from an outer space made out of hay.
make gif"Glowly Mowly!! Talkin' turts! Right where it hurts! Good navies, Lady!"
Make gif
make avatar "Now look what that sick six baby babes braided me to do!" Lean Steene made himself explode into a gentleman!
Make avatar
make gifThe style system has progressed to a rectangulization of yestermornings values. The new model boasts brains and trains of tan.
Make gif

Wednesday, March 9, 2011


The new myspace song is about pyramids. We have over a half hour of free online content now that is great. You don't have to think about it or anything. I know the way I describe it makes it sound so cerebral, but it's just easy listening. You can do things while you listen to it- you don't need a CD, and if you like one play-through then you would like a $3 tape (cheaper than ANY other form of legal media) of 60 minutes of unstopped music.

Also, our tapes are are all one-of-a-kind objects of art. No two are a like and they are all handmade from recycled materials. WHY pay more for plastic stamped by Chinese children who wished they were Mexican children?

Sunday, March 6, 2011

...Music Maps 2

After the debut 10 releases, we'll put the cassette to rest in order to dive deep into the primordial ooze of new media. The musical map program has taken on some new dimension. Songs expressing a landscape will serve as points on a route, they manifest as expressionist loops, and an external variable (possibly your browser navigation) causes you to progress through the territory.

Different albums are different countries in our super continent. Each nation's traditions is diffused into our fantasy world on the internet- replacing the real world with metaphorical "like" parts. As we continue the adventure of songwriting in the Sabertooth Tiger studios, we can leave a cartographic record of the realms we visit.

The philosophy behind our song writing method is expressed on the debut tapes. Red is Roseville tells us that the album is really a place, and music will always be something that should be accepted as scenery. An artist is only a phase, an interchangeable avatar who ebbs on the flow of a popular current. And music? A machine:  Chomsky-esque linguistic programming of preliterate man, vestigial circuits of expression leftover from an animal-pastoral lifestyle.

Some examples of mytheme setting music that we've written in the last week include a windmill and a highway.

Monday, February 28, 2011

...Post-Progressive Futurism

I've been so political feeling lately. Probably because I have too much time and no feeling of needs being met from any arena (other than my girlfriend), but I don't care about unemployment anymore. I'm ready to spend my whole life unemployed because my turn has come. Isn't it somewhat unreasonable to think that I have an entitlement to money and a career now that segregation and racial prejudice have improved? There has always been only enough work and money to keep white men wealthy, and now that women are institutionally equal and affirmative action has developed unto a political load-bearer- why should I expect anything? I'm happy to be jobless, and so should the rest of us. We have an opportunity to create the necessities and structures of the future, and men can finally live a life where they get by just on looks- the way 20th century women were forced to live.

BUT there's one big problem. When boys have nothing to do they will either become criminals or artists. It's important to train male children the feminine arts over the masculine defense now that they have as much chance of living the life of a stay at home dad as 20th C women. "But most families need two incomes to afford children, a car, an a house." Why does everybody need a fucking car and house? That's another entitlement left over from the 1950s. But there is one thing everybody does need:

Communication is the most important commodity in the new millennium. The internet should be free, government: open source, and education: automatic. Why should the words of people who wrote by candlelight and kept slaves be the parameters of quality of life for the internet generation?

I want to start a political blog, but I never will unless there's someone willing to comment on it. I know I have enough cache that somebody must be reading this, but if YOU aren't willing to respond then it's clear that I'm wrong and what the baby-boomers say is right and our generation is just a thankless waste.

Friday, February 18, 2011

...Musical Maps

The last few weeks in the studio have been a combination of hard rumination about Pokemon and the design of our new music format. If you aren't familiar with our instrumentals style yet it's very sweeping, expressionist scoring that imbues the listener with the cinematic feeling of flying over exotic locales. It's essentially landscape painting with music.

But why bother putting the new sound on tape? Why bother burning CDs? We all know that the future of music is live streaming from the web. That's why our next album will be a streaming only release. Listening to the album will be as easy as pulling up a flash website of a map of our fantasy realm. The different pieces will represent the different landforms, and the movements within them are representative of the actions one would perform in that terrain. But don't think about your elementary school biome unit, think more like Zelda dungeons.

We've written a few movements of an ancient Egyptian pyramid, a whispy wood, and an endless void inside the internal organs of a dragon. Expect mountains, villages, castles, factories, spaceships, and the nest of an evil eagle to present in the final album.

Depending on how easily we learn flash animation there will be looping visualizers that correspond to each track on the map. Essentially this is video game that you don't press any buttons to play. This should get nerds really creamed up, and hipsters take note: many of our instruments are custom made and never before seen so don't expect a Playstation Final Fantasy soundtrack.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

...Winning the Future

We're in the fabrication phase (finally) this month at the distro! Orange crates spray painted with primer are to be decorated to house two copies each of our ten debut albums. From five cereal boxes (also primed) come twenty sleeves, and with a casio label-maker and bulk cassettes for $.75 we're ready to hunker in for the crush of the second week of Minnesota February (MF death). The resulting care packages are going to be shopped around the record shops in town first before we sell them online. I'm hoping that a failure in your hometown can constitute a phenomenon in the Asian market, that's my best worst case-scenario.

It's so strange that the night before the Egyptian protests, Zoo Puma and Vampiger were investigating the Great Pyramid of Cheops, when they made a radical discovery: Ancient Egyptians had the ability to magnetize chrome ribbon, and had produced a tape of electro and rock music! When the intrepid crew played the cassette, the Sphinx awakened and declared: "Internet will be banned from the land of Egypt for four thousand years. So sayeth the Sphinx!"

Stay tuned for more exciting fantasy record label stories!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

...Red is Roseville 3

The single Shorty Lo is a pretty ditty. I wrote it whilst walking through the (now through its destruction) mythical paths and trees. There's some graffiti that comprises the chorus, and a description of the natural wonder that makes up the verse. I have a cute voice that's warm over the bright and mellow guitar tracks.

SHORTY LO on MySpacesister

Also, I have a special news bit. We found the new sound! We're in the process of mixing it down from it's original form but let's just say it's ground breaking and it'll change the way you think about the Ancient Egyptians forever!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


For a nominal, negotiable fee Sabertooth Tiger now offers the custom tape service. We have albums and albums worth of content that can be molded into a custom tape for any personality or occasion. We'll re-record songs just for you in what ever style you want. Wonder what Zoobatman would sound like as ska? Or you think Red is Roseville should be sexier? Send an email describing your favorite kind of tape experience.

The bright brittle sound of the steel string, the warmth of the nylon, the bang of the amp... More cowbell, more banjo, more uke, casio, and noise. You're in the drivers seat now- and you decide whats on the album. Covers? You bet, we've got the internet so it can't be too hard to learn a new song or two.

The following is a list of pre-existing content that can be sampled and singled on your mixtape:
  • Zoo Puma + Vampiger: (Alex Kennedy and Beck Kilkenny) These guys are cool dudes and house cats. They make fun of breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Expect trancy-noise-pop synthesizers, sexual slide guitars, bells and whistles, and cool raps. The albums:
    -ZooPuma+Vampiger: GARBAGE, Sunglasses Indoors, My Baby Hearts My GasTank, Kiss Me? Kiss Me. Kiss Me!, HEY GUYS!
    -DANCE TRANE/CD POWER: CD POWER (instrumentals)
    -Zoobatman: Zoobatman, (VGM instrumentals)
    -Brownie Sunday: (dance instrumentals that give you diabetes)
  • Sun Machine (Beck Kilkenny) In the post-apocalyptic recesses of the near future, global warming has evacuated the midwest. The sole survivor is a potpourri smoking prophet of the sun and the future. His destiny is divined from the decayed warble of magnetic tape. By writing prophetic music badass enough to make the whole world party all at the same time Sun Mach will take his destined place in isolation at the center of the universe, waiting for it's inevitable collapse where he will finally become the new sun for the next universe. The albums:
    -2025 (naturalism and plot soundtrack)
    -2050: Invasive Species, Endless Ice, Fireworld, Paper Suburb
    -Sun Mach vs Night Monster (soundtrack) DUST, WEALTH, SMOKE, Night Monster
  • Red is Roseville (Beck Kilkenny) Instructional raps about writing music, and a civic tour guide of the hometown area. Shorty Lo, An Album's a Place, Silence, Red is Right, BUS, Green Oasis, THEME
  • YR CUMMIN 2 R PARTY (collective) We invite our pretty friends to talk while we're playing. Party vignettes play out amidst the overdubs, and for once you don't feel so alone while your listening to your tapes. Don't Go Out 2 the Van, CAKE, No News is Good News, PHONES
  • Ganymede (Beck Kilkenny) Singer/songwriter fare about the self-imposed forces of sophistication. The Oracle, Ganymede, Boxed Wine and Bailey's, Hydroplane, The Rat, The Plan, The End (When I'm Alone), Look Around, Song of a Cardinal
  • Satellite Jazz (collective) Rare synth, static, grand piano, and real stringed instrumental tracks from the jazz musicians at Sabertooth Tiger!

We hope to eventually have all the singles in italics online for free stream and download. But for now you have to pay, but we'll make it unique and special- for you and no one else! Don't pass up on this chance to invest on some hot art!

Saturday, January 22, 2011

...Planet Health

You might wonder why I've been away from my post, or postings- as it were. The truth is that a lack of response is enough deterrent to keep me offline, despite my love of the dandelion propagation and the thrill of web discovery. Also, I feel like its a waste of time to post blogs whilst typing my novel.

That's Planet Health named after the Chairlift song. It doesn't really have to do with the song, but the feelings represent the themes. Hugo DeNaranja loves Susette Florentine, she loves Manny Bannock, so Hugo does too. Manny and Hugo go into business together and Manny turns anti-social and topples the artist-scene ecosystem. The boys retreat to the city where they grow polarized in their pursuit of the shared dream.

That's the first book. The second book is in the outskirts, and the third book is in the future.

I've been writing this novel since 2009, and it's strewn between a few notebooks. I wanted to wait until I owned my own laptop, or at least a computer that doesn't run like a turded moped, to type it. Fer alack, perchance the typing of the novel can fund the computer in the future.

Also, I'm very happy with the myspace singles, they're direct from tape lo-fi versions of our singles! Expect high-def versions real, real soon. I also recorded a cassette album of just acoustic cafe-style versions of songs from a spectrum of albums. For advance order of anything you get interested in, just hit me an email or comment. I feel like my body's been dissected and all the parts are floating away around the world. That's the future of social networking. Dismembered omnipresence.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

New 'space.

Myspace is like facebook but with slightly less moms. We've been recording stuff on tape and now it's stuff on a computer. And it can be on your computer too!